I’ve been reading picture books out loud to my kids for more than a decade. We are the family that makes weekly trips to the library and regularly breaks the handles on our reusable totes getting our haul home. I know and regularly come right up against the check-out limit. Each of the couches in our home usually has at least two books face down on it, and my kids floors are strewn with many more.
Suffice to say, I have opinions.
Nothing is worse than ending up with a bad picture book that your kid wants you to read again and again. Library checkout is hectic with toddlers and babies. I try to place holds on good books ahead of time so I won’t be subject as much to the Russian roulette of whatever cover catches my kids’ eye or stuck reading the same two books over and over. (The picture book lists at Read-Aloud Revival are gold. You’re welcome.) But we do always end up with some random picks each week.
Basically, I have read my share of bad picture books. And so here’s my red-flag, going-back-to-the-library-ASAP checklist:
- Rhyming couplets for no reason – Poetry is fine. Some picture books are excellent examples of the good use of rhyme and meter. If I ever teach a creative writing class, my plan is to use Sandra Boynton’s books as an example of how poetic techniques can control the reader. Hippos Go Berzerk uses enjambment in a way that finally made me finally understand what it is. But if you have to use a throw-away sentence or description just to get the rhyme at the end, your book should not have been in meter in the first place. A lot of self-published picture books fall into this trap because the author thinks rhyming is one of those things kids’ books are “supposed” to do. Hate it. If you aren’t skilled in poetry, stick to prose. It’s fine.
- Advice masquerading as a book – A lot of picture books are message books: “Here’s how you manage anger.” “Listen to your mom the first time.” “Be confident and you can do anything.” It’s even more prevalent with new books because authors want to use picture books to introduce kids to people of other races, family situations, identities, and cultures. All of these are admirable missions, but it’s possible to have a good intention and still be a bad book. A picture book needs a compelling story, not just life advice with illustrations. Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day teaches kids more about dealing with negative emotions than any list of coping techniques, and you can fight me on this one. Reading an interesting story about a person with a different identity will do more for opening a child’s mind to acceptance than a lecture about how great diversity is.
- Unbelievable resolutions – A lot of picture books seem to solve the main character’s problem with a deus-ex-machina in the form of parents or teachers giving advice, the advice being executed perfectly, and the problem solved. I always feel really mad at these books, and my kids usually don’t ask for a second reading. Kids have BS detectors a mile wide. Good advice is cheap; actually executing on it is hard. Picture books should reflect the reality kids experience by leaving things a little messy. For example, Where the Wild Things Are ends when Max recovers enough from his anger to return to reality and eat the supper waiting for him, but there is no promise that he won’t return to the Land of the Wild Things again. In fact, the story implies that this is the natural process of anger, going through the wild emotion to the calm at the other side. The book would feel wrong if it implied that now Max always dealt calmly with his mother when they disagreed; the power is in showing that anger can be gotten through, not that it will be forever fixed with this one weird tip, if you know what I mean.
- Learn-to-read books as read alouds – A lot of people who don’t read to kids often think of Dr Seuss as the top-dog of picture books. What they don’t realize is that the vast majority of Seuss’s books were written for kids who were learning to read. They contain a lot of repetitive words, rhyming, and decodable nonsense words to make them fun for kids to practice reading on. However, these same features make them excruciating to read aloud. I absolutely despise reading Green Eggs and Ham to my kids. One page is literally 15 repetitions of the same five words with difference endings. And there are lots of pages like that. No fun to read. Picture books designed for reading aloud should contain complex vocabulary and structure that a kid couldn’t tackle on their own.
What are your pet peeves? I’m sure some of the things I hate are your favorites. Am I the only one who has strong opinions on picture books to read to your kids? I’d love to hear your opinions in the comments below.
